23rd March 2014

Sonnet 111


Please don't feel obliged to pretend chide

Gender for my lack of noteworthy deeds,

Your paternalistic drive to provide

Cash, dosh, lucre, to support our small breeds.

It was my choice to be a failing brand -

When you're at home all day you get subdued,

Tainted by housework, like the dyer's hand;

And every month oestrogen is renewed.

So much for government guidelines - I'll drink

Pints to quell big girl's hormones infection -

No bitterness that I will bitter think:

Waiting for testosterone correction.*

Pity me not dear friend, I can assure ye:

When I'm dry you'll love the inner male me.


*Increases during female menopause.